2011 has been a year of self-discovery.
Back in the spring, I took an art course at the university where I work. As the semester progressed, I began to notice that I was really looking forward to class and really dreading the trudge back to my desk.
Things reached a head in October, when I finally put to words what I'd been feeling over the preceding months - my passion is not in programming, but the creative arts. The majority of my job was emotionally draining and required very little original creativity. Day after day, I languished in my cubicle, daydreaming about making things at which people enjoyed looking - work that inspired and endured.
So, after much prayer and discussion with my wife, I submitted my resignation. Come January 31, 2012, I will be 'sans employment.' The plan is be hired well before that. There are some hurdles, however - A modest portfolio and living in a rural area without a lot of tech-related jobs being the two biggest.
It's been eleven days - correction, it's been a long eleven days - since I gave my resignation. I've submitted several applications and even had an interview over the phone (I don't think they liked the idea of hiring someone who wanted to work from home over moving).
There are good days and bad days - times of optimism and despair. What I was unprepared for, though, was the effect all this stress and drama would have on me physically. I'm totally drained at the end of the day. It's as if I won't be able to rest - truly rest - until I know things are going to be okay. Which I kinda already believe - but I don't know how or when, and that's the distinction.
There's not really a point to this. I mainly felt like the blog needed dusting off and the recent lack of activity explained. I cannot tell you how eager I am to be in a creatively stimulating environment and getting the 'juices of inspiration' flowing again. And when that day comes - and it is coming - I will have such wonderful things to share.
Until then, send a good thought my way. If you're the praying type, I'd appreciate it if you'd offer one up for a stranger trying to follow his heart for once, instead of his thick head.